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Big Mac comes clean, remains dirty

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As if there was any doubt Mark McGwire confirmed that he used performance enhancing drugs. He did it solely for medical purposes. You don’t say. What ailment exactly Mark? Elephantitis of the Testicles? Some sort of back acne deficiency? Listen Mark, I’m an A’s fan, and as such you hold a very special place in my heart. You lived in my home town when I was a kid, and seeing you around town was one of the highlights of my childhood. I think you’re a good guy, a fantastic baseball player, and from all reports a really good dad. There is a lot to like about you. So please Mark, I beg you, stop selling me dog $h*t and calling it perfume. You didn’t take supplements for medical reasons any more than I take bong hits ingest medical marijuana for glaucoma.

I know there’s probably a couple readers waiting to comment "he did it to recover quicker you idiot" and I’m sure that was part of his motivation. The problem I have with all this new found "honesty" is he keeps the same BS company line that "steroids didn’t help me perform! That’s just silly, I just took them to get back on the field". Right, and the 1976 German swim team took them because all those girls were just dying to shave their faces like the boys. Hell, Barry Bonds only took them because he always dreamed of fitting into Mr. Met’s hat.

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As a fan all I’m waiting for is someone to step to the podium and say the following….

"Listen I had a choice. The choice was stay clean, keep my integrity, be a good role model, and maybe be out of baseball in 6-8 years, or I could juice, have a more impressive peak, a much more gradual decline and retire a baseball immortal. At the time syringes were as common place as groupies and I didn’t really think the risk of being caught was real. We were all doing it, and Buddy Selig loved us for saving baseball. I’ve made numerous millions of dollars and hit for tons more power because of what I did. I cheated because I thought no one was looking, hell until that crazy twitching bastard Canseco started singing, no one was looking."

I’m not asking for much, just some real honesty, and until we get that I can’t forgive a single one of these guys not even the ones I liked (sorry Mark).