clock menu more-arrow no yes mobile

Filed under:

If Our Team Needs Pitchers...

New, 3 comments

If you buy something from an SB Nation link, Vox Media may earn a commission. See our ethics statement.

I want Dirk Hayhurst. Whatever role we need filled... starter, mop-up duty, closer, designated hitter, quarterback, whatever - Dirk Hayhurst can handle it.

For those unaware, Dirk Hayhurst is much more than just a relief pitcher for the Toronto Blue Jays.

He's the author of a book due out at the end of March called The Bullpen Gospels: Major League Dreams of a Minor League Veteran. It's gotten pretty decent reviews so far, and his website features a bunch of the highlights, such as this quote by Keith Olbermann:

There are great truths within, of the kind usually unspoken. And as he expresses them, Dirk Hayhurst describes himself as "a real person who moonlights as a baseball player." In much the same manner, while The Bullpen Gospels chronicles how all of us face the impact when we learn reality is both far meaner and far richer than our dreams – it also moonlights as one of the best baseball books ever written.

I'm going to make a bold prediction here, but I'll bet that Dirk's work is the surprise sports book of 2010. New York Times Best Seller list? I wouldn't be shocked.

If you want to get a better sample of his writing, I encourage reading his latest article: Bullpen Gospels: How Luck Is Made, where Dirk brilliantly explains how one mysterious ace pitcher, that's totally not Roy Halladay, sets the bar for how athletes should go about mastering their craft.

But besides being a major league-caliber pitcher and writer, you also get the impression that Dirk Hayhurst is sort of a pretty great guy. Dirk has a Twitter handle setup under @TheGarfoose - Dirk's half-giraffe, half-moose alter ego, which you can learn more about here - and lately, he's been doing more than his part to encourage his followers to do what they can to support relief efforts in Haiti. Offering up his most valuable possessions, like baseballs autographed by Roy Halladay or ones with especially rare Garfoose drawings, Dirk is nearing $1000 in donations. (By the way - feel free to add what you can at TheGarfoose's Haiti Response Fundraiser.)

It all paints a picture to me of a guy who is quite a bit more than just a relief pitcher. So when our team takes the field, I'm going to recommend that we try to trade for Dirk Hayhurst. It will be up to the members (and I guess the Blue Jays GM, but that's a minor detail...) but keep in mind - if we acquire Dirk, we may get The Garfoose thrown in as an option to be the team mascot.